I have two daughters. Therefore, based on the etiquette standards of our society, my husband and I have hosted (read “financed”) two weddings. On each occasion we wanted to give our daughters and our future sons-in-law the best we could possibly afford.
We wanted everything perfect. Or at least I did.
After each wedding a video began playing in my head of every little detail that went wrong. I’ve learned through these expensive experiences that (1) weddings are BIG business; and (2) I should have gone into the wedding business! But these videos of all the less-than-perfect moments began to control my thoughts when I tried to sleep at night. When well-meaning friends would ask, “Sooo, how was the wedding?” When I tried to walk and pray!
Why did the florist tell me we would get frilly-tipped tulips, only to give us regular tulips at the last minute? Why didn’t the iron sconces look like the ones in her album?
Why was the cake leaning like the tower of Pisa (in both weddings!) Can’t anyone make a cake that doesn’t lean?
Why did the wedding coordinator have us light the sparklers and not get my daughter and son-in-law to walk out BEFORE the sparklers went out – totally missing the moment for the photographer? (2nd wedding)
Why did the wedding coordinator tell me she would bring an “army of helpers” only to show up alone and solicit help from my secretary? (1st wedding)
Even now, writing about this, I can see the videos replaying and my frustration level rising! But thankfully, the Word of God comes to my rescue:
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things. Philippians 4:8 (TNIV)
I started redirecting my thoughts to line up with this Word. The truth is, no wedding is perfect so I just needed to get over it! Marriage is noble and right. I’m so thankful my daughters chose marriage! My daughters and their husbands are pure. My husband and I could not be more proud or thankful for God’s grace in protecting their purity and bringing them husbands of purity as well! My daughters are indeed lovely! And the highlight of each wedding for me was the moment their father walked out with his beautiful daughter on his arm! My new sons are admirable men of God. They are men that will stand among kings and be admired by their children and children’s children.
When it comes to weddings – and other such frustrations – my focus is on everything that is excellent and praiseworthy. In my case with both weddings, the excellence of God is now being revealed in two holy marriages.
And best of all… absolutely perfect grandchildren! (And all the grandmothers shout, “Amen!”)
Why don’t you tell the video of frustrating thoughts, “Stop!” Start a new mental movie based on Philippians 4:8. What can you think about that is True? Noble? Right? Pure? Lovely? Admirable? Excellent? Praiseworthy?
Now go ahead – think on those things!
